Tuesday, December 18, 2012

I feel like crap and I am really angry tonite. Not sleeping even though I took my nite meds... Ugh. Keep thinking about my ex best friend who fucked me over.
As soon as I was diagnosed and told her she was oh, SO upset, and then as my treatments progressed she was about as supportive as a doorknob. And had the nerve to tell me the last time I spoke to her that I didn't support HER. She has constantly and continuously forgotten every damn time in the last 40 years that I stood up for her, and drooped everything to help her or just be there with her, even at the expense of my kids and relationship. She goes thru men like she goes thru beer and uses people to get what she wants. I'm tired of feeling like I did something wrong.  And I don't know what to do about it. I get it, she cant handle being at the hospital, I turned her invites to the bar down more than I actually went. But when it counted, when I really needed her, she showed up ONCE. One fucking time. Forty years of friendship. Fuck you too.  

Any advice???? Tell me "Friend who SUX"story!

Monday, December 17, 2012

Sunday, December 16, 2012


I have been asking this question since I was diagnosed with Breast Cancer in Feb 11. WHERE IS ALL OF THE MONEY GOING??? If all of this "Research" money actually was going to collaborated research we should have a cure by now!


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We tested eight fragrances to check for phthalates. Five of them are top sellers from some of the largest perfume manufacturers, including Celine Dion Parfums Eau de Toilette Spray by Coty, Clinique Happy Perfume Spray, Elizabeth Taylor White Diamonds Eau de Parfum, Estée Lauder Beautiful Eau de Parfum Spray, and Liz Claiborne Curve Eau de Toilette Spray. Here's what else we tested and our surprising findings:

* All the fragrances we tested contained at least these two phthalates: Di(2-ethylhexyl) phthalate (DEHP), which is banned in cosmetics in Europe, and diethyl phthalate (DEP), which is not banned and was present in much larger amounts. Our findings seem counter to a fragrance-industry survey that reported DEHP use is down to zero.

* Two products--Aubrey Organics Jade Spice Eau de Parfum and Aveda Love Pure-Fume Essence--went into the test group because the companies say they don't contain any phthalates. But we found DEP, DEHP, and diisodecyl phthalate (DIDP) in the Aubrey Organics product. Aveda's perfume contained DEP and DEHP.

* Estée Lauder says that DEP is the only phthalate used in any of its products, but we found DEHP along with DEP in Estée Lauder Beautiful and its Clinique Happy. (The company also owns Aveda.) A Liz Claiborne representative told us that none of its products contains DEHP, but we found that chemical--plus DEP--in Liz Claiborne Curve.

* We tested Christian Dior Poison Eau de Toilette Spray because in 2002, tests by the Environmental Working Group, Health Care Without Harm, and Women's Voices for the Earth found that it had four types of phthalates, more than any of the other 16 fragrances tested. The 2002 study found DEP, DEHP, dibutyl phthalate (DBP), and benzyl butlyl phthalate (BBP) but our tests showed only DEP and DEHP.

* We bought Happy, Poison, and Beautiful in both the U.S. and Europe, and found the E.U.-banned phthalate DEHP in all the samples.

* No fragrances mentioned phthalates on their labels. But by law, they can list the word "fragrance" without citing any of its components, including phthalates.